I Have Moved to http://wishinggx.blogspot.com! ;D
Date : Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Time : 11:53 PM


hoorayy
sir teexian fixed the bscl! ;D
cant believe i slpt from 6+ till now. @@
must be very tired :X
hahas.
still very sleep -walks around like zombie-
T.T here so hot la, no air ventilation
sleep wad shit, all my father's fault.
hot until can die man, sleep also cannot sleep well.

his room so cooling can, board fan somemore.
then u on to 2 alr very cooling, on 3 best siahs.
somemore we dont on aircon one, never did.

today plae national anthem and sch song......
squeaked very loud omg x.x
then i dont dare blow ._. cux i scared squeak agian

arghhhh HOT LA HERE OMGGGGGG HELPPP.
i gng bathe alr dis. CANT STAND IT
and i can't exceed 1am. cant use com. beyond 1am.
and since when was i so obedient huh :X
argh. HOT HOT HOT.
i think here can do sauna alr ._.
maybe u put egg here can cook siahs.
boring day.
sleepy day.
tiring day.
emo day.
sayonara.
God, i thank you for everything.
I thank you for helping me.
I pray that everything goes well again.
And You will hear me, hear my cries.
For You are the one I love, my Saviour King.
And Father, I worship you.
I pray that you will take away my sins.
You sacrificed Jesus and let Him die on the cross for us.
O Lord I offer my devotion.
and I will tell the world about you, tell the world that He lives.
The King above all Kings.
Our dear Father.
Amen.


Date : Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Time : 9:03 PM


today ran 2.4km.
i got 14.46 as a record.
it's a B.
my sit and reach was 41.
it's a B too.
my sit ups is arnd 20-30.
it should be around C to B.
everything so far is around B/C..
tired.

haven do homework.
memorising scchool song score now.
i'm very. very. busy.
and i'm eating, typing and trying to memorise sch song.
and there's 2 people talking to me on msn.
hais..

i pray that this stops now.


Date :
Time : 8:24 PM


been 'fiddling' with the bass clarinet..
up till now.
haven bathe.
haven eat
haven do any homework.

'sort of' memorised the national anthem.
working on the school song now..
)): sir teexian say i will die if i can't memorise..

i called alot of people,
to ask about the bass clarinet.
hais. die alr..
tmr sir teexian checking the bass clarinet..
and tmr sir teexian checking the blazers all these.
mam fiona and mine, the blazers, sent to dry cleaning.
and then sir teexian seemed angry
)): i tink i made him angry alot. his instrument and this.
and the score also. because i sure die tomorrow..

hais. today not late for sch alr.
bus card no money alr.
tmr asking mam clara and mam fiona gimme morning call ehs.
i dont think i can wake up without people forcing me ah )):
cux even if i pick up the call alr, i will go back sleep one..
tmr must wake up very early, let sir teexian check the instrument..
im worried. wad if something happened to the instrument....

i dont care about sch work alr lahs..
i sure die man )): the instrument..
concert is also coming. and i can't practise..
and then i wasn't even supposed to borrow this instrument home..
and plus..what will happen to the instrument..

mr samad is so gona kill me..
sir teexian is so gona be angry at me..
mr tan also..
and then they will all lose faith and trust in me..
then i will kena being suan and neglected and disliked alr..
then they wont talk to me anymore..
)))): sure dieeee...

and then sir teexian ask me not to worry too much )):
how can....
im losing sleep alr T.T
say sorry also no use )):
gomenasai T.T
sumimasen T.T
sayonara....
it will be good ;
and i will pray alot.
that the instrument will be fine..
if it isn't. please dont hate me..
put the blame on me, it's my fault.
because you trusted ur instrument to me
but i didnt took enough care of it
i wasn't even supposed to borrow ur instrument home
you allowed me to..
there's nothing more i can say.
i'm really sorry...
arigatou gozaimasu.
if you really understand.
i worry about the instrument more..
i can't do anything now..
i'm sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry sorry..
and i'm really really very sorry..


Date : Monday, April 28, 2008
Time : 9:50 PM


hahas.
im creating themes for handphones! ;D
blahs :X if i'm free.
any request? HAHA :3


Date :
Time : 7:17 PM


hais. troubled ehs. about the bscl.
sure die le lah ): i veri worried. and scared.
i worked on it from 4pm till 6.30pm, 2 1/2 hours.

wadever happens, will happen le lurhs.
))): best i dont remind myself of it alr.

btw here's vampire knight! ;D
ah..i always love vampire knight :X
hehes. ;D i love vampires.
it's cool mahs :X i like living in fantasy @@

mm..going do homework alr.
got like, chinese..2 whole compre haven do.
AND I DONO HOW TO DO SIAHS!
haa ya..

btw i dling vampire knight themes! HAHAS!
ya :X and i gona chng everything to vampire knight :X
sad rights, they haven upload Chapter 40 of Vampire Knight.
or Episode 4 of Vampire Knight ))):

oyah. andandand.
SHERMAN CHEW same msn dp as me!
haha so coincidence =="
and that wasnt him on friday :X
and he's the same height as me omg @@
-rawr! HE CHASE UP MY HEIGHT ALR!-

okays. so i talked to terence yong also today on msn.
ee. tall ppl..now also arnd 160-170+ alr )):
and im still stuck at 158-160 @@

hais. no specs ahs!
made report alr :X
mm..if really cant find must ask JODY lend me her specs yahs.

sayonara (:



Date : Sunday, April 27, 2008
Time : 8:28 PM



vampire knight!
hahas (:

P.S. terrance. dont say you hate vampire!

(: vampire lover~
hahahas! :X
found 30 pictures of Vampire Knight!
i'm gona upload one every post (:
ahaha, craving for more Vampire Knight @@
read the Manga, but haven complete ): cux dont have next episode. Anime in video only episode 3.


Date :
Time : 12:57 PM


back from church and eating.
the auntie and uncle, uncle victor's friends
blanja me eat :X
andand, i can't actually take spicy or gassy drinks.
but i took it anyway @@.
the korean food was delicious (:
not very spicy, but ya, for me, i still need water @@.

okay, church was...fine today (:
yupp!

and my fone bills..
i nidda find a way to settle
i've even got myself a "money management" notebook.
andand, calculated all the income i get
what i will spend on
how much i need to save
my total savings
and and. all these @@


Date : Saturday, April 26, 2008
Time : 8:41 PM


feels..restless.
emotionally.
i feel empty.
like a doll without her cottons.
like as if..i'm dead.

i feel invisible.
i dont feel my..existence.

i have..alot of things on my mind
having..mix feelings inside
like..confused..
depress..
irritated..
annoyed..
and..i dont really care what's gona happen to the world anymore.

i..feel veri..weird.
and..i dont like..this at..all.....

i'm..running a fever..
feeling..dizzy..
had a..headache moments ago..
i'm like..a zombie now..

i dont..feel like..doing aniting nw..
and..i feel abit weird..
empty..


Date : Friday, April 25, 2008
Time : 11:14 PM


advertise for sir yyz ._.

"BUYING PSP AND SELLING 2 PSP,
DOING CRACKING OF PSP,
SELLING PSP GAMES AND UPGRADE/DOWNGRADE AND LOTS MORE..."
ENQURIES PM
lone98@hotmail.com

hais.


Date :
Time : 10:44 PM


okay. so im not pissed off anymore.
cooled down already.
tired th0ugh.
annoyed.

do u like the new blogskin?
i love the song.
hehs. ;D

wants more green tea!

why didnt my temper last longer?
it's strange.
it was always much longer.

i dont seem to loose too much temper on you.
and i dont scold you any vulgarities at all.
yup. i scolded the way you said it was a joke
is that considered as scolding you?


Date :
Time : 7:24 PM


and u noe what sucks.
terrance thought it was a joke.
he thought it was a BLOODY FKING JOKE.
ya and im so. so. so. so. pissed off.
i never joked.
never did.
oh hell.
and i just logged off like that.
i wasn't in any mood.
to joke.
i had to come home
and face all the craps?

#first; the internet connection was not connected.
and i had to fix it the moment i got home.

#second; i was so bloody fking hungry
and i hadn't eaten anything.

#third; i logged in and faced someone laughing at me
and hell it hurts alot dammit.

#fourth; im so gona log off now.because i've halfway crying
and halfway pissed off. thats it.


Date :
Time : 7:10 PM


i walked for 3hours
non stop.
from 4+ till just nw like 7.
I GOT BLOODY LOST DAMMIT.

i walked from suyi hse.
then i duno hw go back
i walk, kept walking
walk until block 201A there,
i stuck, stuck there
then i stalked someone out
saw the bus stop
unfortunately, no money.
btw i saw jiexin.

i walked the wrong way
and i ended up walking a big circle
and back to square one.
then i kept walking again.
yup. this time, the other direction.
and my god damn phone went battery flat.
and i saw sherman.

and i was walking
and walking
and walking
without stopping.
cux i noe if i stop, i wont carry on.
yup
i walked alot.
---------------------------------------------

before all that,
i was taking my chinese exam at 8+
my chinese sure fail.
i crapped all the way in my compo.
didnt noe what to write.

english was okay, but i tink i exceeded the limit
sure, i said 800, u all sure dont believe me.
the limit was 400.
and then i was looking at my handwritting.
small handwritting.
sure over 400.

i folded a paper heart by the fold straw heart way.
i folded a white paper crane
and a star with the left over paper, with words written.

then i went to library again today
with agnes.
and i wanted to go home
--------------------------------------------------

this was the part when i met alicia and suyi and then stuff like that.
oya i saw an eagle.
veri rare nowadays.
haven seen one since i was 4.
and then there was like 40 birds in a group
flying together. hell...

hell. the back of my foot hurts
and i have worst blisters at the back of my ankle now
because i alr had blisters, i just made it worst.
okay, i assure u.
tmr, i'll probably not wake up like at noon.
maybe the evening though.
my shoulder hurts too
and i was so hungry.
my bag was heavy. very heavy.
and i didnt eat aniting since 10am+
hell. today was...total crap.


Date : Thursday, April 24, 2008
Time : 9:59 PM


im tired today.
tired.
sch till like 3pm
with agnes we then go bedok
find the library
at arnd 4+ we found the library
then we stayed till 6+ going 7.
then i rched home at 7.16+pm
ya.

vampire knight is great.
read alot of it.

wonder why
why
why why why.
im feeling so depress.
about something.
ya, something..
why? it's not me.

im bothered.
by you.
can u all like
stop appearing before me
you clearly lied to me.
lied to me.

please, would u please
just get the hell away from me.
seriously. i can't stand it.
and i hate you
i hate you more than ever.


Date : Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Time : 7:31 PM


long tiring day.
heard tmr got reverie.

aft sch went whitesands with agnes.
eat, shop, go library
and where ever i was
cecilia, kathrine and sandra was there.
and i saw sir hy and sir hadi in library.

yup, and then i was like, oh my tian.
andandand.

agnes said i looked 16, i dont look 14.
and i think i haf a mind of an 18 or smth.

i went to library to read about psychology stuff.
like erm, love, opposite gender and their emotion, problems, confidence.
ya, it seems freakly weird cux it's not something a 14yr old girl
-stresses on 14yr old girl-
should read about.

had stomach pain whole day.
man, im still having it now......

hais, homework
homework
and more homework!

art, geo, ARGH!
._. ya and exam's on friday.

LOST MY SPECS
still cant find.
help? @@


Date : Monday, April 21, 2008
Time : 5:44 PM


u noe, i slpt at lyk 4am+..
yup, barely slpt.
had dis wana-vomit-plus-fainty-situation going on.
slpt..

but i woke up,
felt fainty n wana vomit.
went to sch feeling fainty.

thank god, no stomachache todae.
but giddy, had panadol.

chat with elvira from like, aft school
till she left the bus since we both took 28.

blahs, didnt allow me to tie my hair!
and i hate the wind messing up my hair ._.
haa, i look scaryyyy.


Date : Sunday, April 20, 2008
Time : 1:03 PM


today was the first time i wore ring earrings ._.
yup, those big big ones @@.
heh, church was okay today.
i wear until i looked so adult-ly @@
yups, like some 16-18 girl ._.

ha! went home to emo @@
after a long tiring day....


yups, emo. ;D lols.



can see the big ring anot?
it's hanging at my ears.
heh, :X boredooms.

wore white jacket,
black tee shirt
plus jeans
black shoes
and with the white bdae bag i got from mam clara.

happy belated bdae mam mandy! ;D

blahs.
hot ah. HOT HOT HOT!
lols. :X


Date : Saturday, April 19, 2008
Time : 9:15 PM


PHOTO SESSION.


ORH ORH! ILLEGAL GATHERING!
hahas :X took secretly one ;D



agnes is posing for the camera
@@ ya, she owns a STAR face :X



ANOTHER ILLEGAL GATHERING EH!
ya :X fun mahs. secretly took also xD
HAHA, U SEE ONE SUPERMAN?
that one arif :X, fake tall one xD
stand on chair/table :X
rest of us were drawing ;D



._. ya, since nth to do, pain my hand ;D



my name! ;D hahas. :X



yup yup, it's all written there.



i drew this on whiteboard :X
and that extra two finger belongs to AGNES
(the almighty AGNES, all hail to AGNES.)



my fav' drawings :X draw it everywhere i go hahas.
yup, on whiteboard.
-sure use alot marker ink @@-



agnes doodled this out :X
i added the wings and tail :X
FLY PIGGIE! FLYYYYYY



my peanut :X headband i draw one,
face also.
but the lines is agnes draw one.
the body i draw one xD
TERRANCE SAY LOOK LIKE SOCKS!
arif say NINJA PEANUT



agnes with her rings ._.
ya RINGS.
nah, the store de LOL.
i bought 5 alr :X



heh, made it at store today ;D



me owns the rings :X



MY MOUSE! NO ONE TOUCH IT :X



heh, bought it.
JODY has one too ;D
same identical one @@



me rings :X hehes.



name peg!



name peg again!

-------------------------------------------------

ahah!
i tended the stall today
till like 12.25pm i go walkwalk around.
nice selling (:
hahas! i didnt do the CIP refreshments.
aw, sad right?

tended the stall with isaac, weiheng, agnes.
agnes walks around.
i was at the stall from 7.52am till 12.25pm
then back at it again until duno hw long.
yup.

weiheng bought the drink WHATEVER
then drink halfway dowan.
then i drink, then isaac drink, then i finish it.
mm..i dont mind sharing saliva, do u?
i dont care anyway.
FREE DRINK ;D

tiring ah.
ytd had a long confidential chat.
yup. cried.

terrance says he may be going to aussie
his fren asked him to go with her for 2weeks.
hahas , wonder if he goes.

actually not supposed to be here.
i shd alr off the com.
mm..nvm :X

i thought u guys would trust me.
i thought u guys would.
to think u were the same as the others
i thought u guys were different.
i trusted u all..


Date : Friday, April 18, 2008
Time : 10:31 PM


i lost my specs.
god.
i tink i lost it in the needlework room.
cux after the CE period, i couldnt find my specs.

something major happened today.
confidential.
not for disclosure.

reading The Summer Psychic.
bloody nice.

tmr gona do deco.
waking up at 5.30am.
then at 8.30 meet up.
must serve the guest ting de.
refreshments.

bloody tired.
not really bloody.
just very very tired.

took pics today.
reached home at 8pm+
and no, there's no band.
i helped with the deco and wrapping and stuff.
must bring soft toy, books , accessories or ornaments tomorrow.

okays. shall end here.
baby, are u really okay?
im worried though.

sayonara.


Date : Thursday, April 17, 2008
Time : 9:06 PM


i know he's not okay with it.
he's just pretending to be happy
so that somehow he feel that he won't make me worry.
he's acting as if it's normal.

i'm being more emo than he is.
he says to me.
typically, it's abit true.
because i feel sad for the people,
i sympathise.

i dont agree trying to be happy than be emo.
i dont agree being emo either.
but i rather he cry out nw, cry out loud now.

it hurts to see you pretend, see u trying to be happy.
ya and im worried about u baby.
i worry.

aw and im sorry
im really sorry
i dont know and know nothing
to say to you to comfort you
i dont know what to do too ):
im sorry.
i'm trying to change the topic
and let u think of something else.
at least, leave ur mind about that subject.
): yah. baby, dont suppress everything in ur heart.


Date :
Time : 8:12 PM


stomachache and headaches often nowadays.
nt veri hapy today.
): yups.
and my junior didnt come.

had to endure being squashed in bus.
some uncle just leaned against the bscl case
and i was so damn pissed off.
ya, he thought it was a wall or some pillar.

im tired.
and baby's confused and upset.
-so am i-
and it's confidential.

ate dinner just nw.
ate chocolate.
eating yoghurt now.


Date : Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Time : 7:41 PM


awwwwww.
today wednesday
i forgot.
then i slpt till 6.20am.
==" yahs.
then i forget bring tie!
ALMOST FORGOT BRING BLAZER.

ya and then today i whole day stomachache
now also still having ): wonder whats wrong.

went for IT.
aft IT went to band.
lols! so late liao i still go band.
at like 6pm i go.
6.30 lidat i go home ._.
aw, ya!

elvira say my hair nice ):
its nice, but i wan messy look :X
if not i wan straight hair!
hahas. :X


Date : Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Time : 8:14 PM


arent u smart
getting on my nerves.
"like that lorh"
like that, how?
i ask u la, how.

aw, today almost late ah.
i kena sit there.
arrived at arnd 7.50 ah ._.
saw sir fredrick, mam crystaline and mam jasmine
all late with me lols.!

took same mrt with sir fredrick.
and he stood infront of me.
the mrt damn crowded ah.
i kena squashed.
then i almost couldnt get out of mrt ._.

aw, day at sch was boring today.
free 5 period though (:
woah! NICE RIGHT.
i chat with prestela, isaac and chongteck
the whole time till recess.

band was okay.
except that my junior is getting on my nerves.
he doesnt even pay attention.
argh, im so pissed off.

then in the end i push him to nicholas ._.
lalalas.

ya! it's nicer now that sir fredrick
dont look so uncomfortable
when i talk to him or smth

hungry lil' piggy.
im hungry :X

and i cant seem to see eye to eye with her.
serious.
and i wonder why too.
but i know she dislikes me.
im sure u do too.


Date : Monday, April 14, 2008
Time : 7:22 PM


-' hqeq ❥; nohssiwi
nwod edispu wnorf taht nrut ):
FIGURE THOSE OUT :X

tiring day.
had headache since after recess
till halfway of band self practise.

used sir teexian's bscl.
aw, and it's freakiing easier to blow ._. serious.

hahas, ya, and thats all that.

maybe sye was mistaken about u.
but u're still the person who hurted her most.
ever since that day when they talked.
go out and shop, went for movies.

maybe he's not so bad after all.
and that girl is fortunate to have him.
full-stop baby.


Date : Sunday, April 13, 2008
Time : 10:17 PM


Devotion
Hillsong United

Verse 1

I've been running, trying to be one who sees
I've been working, salvation out on my knees
There is nothing better than knowing
That we are redeemed
Unbelieving trusting in creative hands,
I am praying for our world to bow to your plan
And this one thought is unmistakable
I take up my cross and follow you Lord

Chorus

When you stand the tall trees and mountains bow
When you speak the fiercest of oceans is still
And I see the sinner seek devotion
The lost become chosen, and I fall to my knees

Verse 2

Unforgiven, my savior who did not deserve death
He was blameless and I was lost in shamefulness
Undelivered, but it doesn't seem right
Unless I keep my eyes focused on the savior who gave his live
In the middle of a world that denies it believes
It is breaking apart at the very seams
There is one thing to be alive for
And it's to take up my cross and follow you Lord

Bridge

I will take up my cross and follow Lord where you lead me
And I will take up my cross and follow wherever you go



Date :
Time : 9:16 PM


hehs, long day.
youth today was fun.
we worshipped God.
we sang some song
and i liked most of them
one of it was Savior King (:

aft church today i went to library
went for 2hours :X
came back home and read the book.
damn nice. "The Summer Psychic"

ah, slpt from like 2+pm to 7+pm.
now posting la, just nw eating.
ya and im like, gona bathe ltr :X

hahas (:
terrance :D

ha, i managed to enjoy myself
and i managed to stop looking.
and i managed to forget your presence.


Date : Saturday, April 12, 2008
Time : 10:52 PM


I JUST FREAKING REACHED HOME.!
went to kallang stadium after band today.
hahaha! very nice! :X
sat there till 7.35pm.
then we went to shopping centre makan.
arnd 8-9+pm we go.
the marching band all damn nice siahs!

then hor, on the way home
i keep saying ghost stories leh!
to sir teexian, sir hongyong, sir hadi and sir fredrick. :X
hahaha!
then i told mam wanjie and mam fiona also :X so damn cool man.

it was nice la, talking to them all.
hahas.

then i went to buy stuff,
walk along deserted places.
and smsing ghost stories to them :X

we pangseh sir hadi, he lives in pasir ris mahs :X so funni.
man, i need a new reed too.
hahas just nw veri funni la
i love walking at night (:
it was so quiet, peaceful, deserted.
tmr got church.
awww..hahas.
aiyoh, hahahas.
i enjoyed myself today.
had fun! and i chat with ppl
i never chat with before,
but sir fredrick was abit unsmooth
with talking to me lurh.
he talk keep look at other ppl one.
then i ask him question he nvr face me and answer one.
so bad ):
hahas, iloveeeeeeeeeeeeebscl yahs.
and ilove band (: seriously.
AND I LOVE SNOOPY :D


Date : Friday, April 11, 2008
Time : 10:46 PM


im not a substitude.
so don't come to me when you have a problem
dont ask me to do things for you.
you calm that you trust me
but u didnt even tell me when you had that person.
you only used me.

i felt like a disposable tubberware.
when you need me, you use.
when you don't need me, you throw me away.

it apply to this manner,
you only come to me when you have a problem
when you need a favour from me.
but when you don't need me,
you just totally shut me out of your life
you neglect me.

do you know how sick this is.
it's back to square one.
like when i was in P5 and P6.

i thought you were different.
but you proved me wrong.
you were the same as others.

next time, don't ever come to me.
i'll just close that conversation.
and i'll pretend nothing happen.



Date :
Time : 10:21 PM


my heart.
gets colder every time i see you.
i want to stop this.
i want to stop all of this.
when can i stop seeing you appearing
infront of me again and again?

i'm sorry
i didn't meant it when i said sorry.
my sorries are always hollow.
because i didnt put any feelings into saying it.
it was a cold, hard 'sorry'.

i'm just cold.
plain mean and evil.
you can't count on me.
seriously, dont count on me.

you know, i hate you.
but at the same time,
i can't bring myself to hate you.

that person just depise me.
that person just stare at me like that.
why did that person badmouth me.
why?

i've got nothing to do with you.
i don't want to have any more to do with you.
i'll promise you.
but i'll never care about you.
because you never did.

dont come running to me if you're hurt
don't let my heart go soft again.
because it's already harden by you.
nobody's gona pity you.
you brought it upon yourself.
you solve it.


Date :
Time : 6:28 PM


baby i cant help looking at you.
like you did last time.
we exchanged glances often,
when we were back then.
now, it's just blank stares.
baby, it's not the same anymore.

i drew a damn emo piece of A4 size pictures.
alot words lahs, go friendster see (:
hahas, 16pic in total.


Date :
Time : 6:20 PM


i hate u for deserting me like that.
without a reason at all.
now even if i look at you.
i dont see my holding place in your heart anymore.


had band today.
i got new mouthpiece! SO HAPPY LEHHHS.
hahaas :X ya and i can play today!.

i was pissed off a SOMEONE and then
when i was playing the scores,
SURPRISINGLY ALL CAN COUNT SIAHS!
hahahahas, happy happy :X
blahs but im still pissed off at him.

did cooking today for home econ course work common test.
woah, and it went badly horribly terrible.
ya..not gona say aniting else blahs.

eating sushi now :X
ownself make de :D
with left over materials from cooking @@.

BAND BAND BAND!
tmr band again! :X
happi happi ahs.
hope can play again!

omg CHIA WEI SAID HE LOVE ME TODAY
lols.
because i helped him picked him his worksheet
and pass it to him =="
then people around me was also giving a surprise look.
i also gave a very horribly ugly surprise look.
but yah, no one took it for real.
so it's okay.
i tink he said it out of gratitude.


Date : Thursday, April 10, 2008
Time : 8:24 PM


in the past.
why did you cry, when i cried.
in the present.
why didn't you cry, when i cried.

in the past.
why did you care so much when i hurt.
in the present.
why didnt you care, even if i bleed, i hurt.

in the past. why did we get along so well.
in the present.
why didnt you look at me once more.

in the past.
why did you treat me so well
in the present.
why did you neglect me now

in the past.
why did you let me depend on you.
in the present.
where was you when i needed you.

in the past.
i always thought we were good friends.
in the present.
it's nothing more, just distant people now.



Date :
Time : 8:09 PM


it was a silent break.
we just didnt talk for a whole month.
thats it.

haaa. boringggg :X

eating dinner now..
hais..

why is my self esteem so low huh..
i think it was because of the continuos
random sad things that happened to me.
i shouldnt ponder over it.
really..

still rmb P5..he said i was ugly.
P3/P4, kena told that i was unpleasant to the eye.
P6..people told me i look malay and ugly.
P6..niki and her frens yoshi,lucas..sad case.
sec 1, some random people say i ugly.
sec 2, self esteem lowers more.

there's people who say i looked thinner now
than i was thin when i was sec 1.

cheer up girl ):

i knew it was all fake,
all lies, and you.
you were pretending to be nice.
im sorry, your tactics didnt work.
i saw through it, but rather late.
hurt, seriously hurts.


Date :
Time : 8:03 PM


blahs.
had a rough day today.
damn tired yahs.

slpt alot lurhs.
talked alot also.
tomorrow home econ common test le.
do cooking ): course work.

hais, i still cant count ):
and today i taught my junior ._.
then he took the 3rd reed today.
1st reed broke, 2nd reed forget bring.
hais then my mouthpiece and instrument got rico royal smell ._.

left band room around 6.50-7pm.
just came back btw.

))): people are getting pissed off at me.
and when people laugh,
i always think they are laughing at me.
hais....

"can i have my stuff back?"
was all i had to say.
but i didnt.
why? i can't bring myself to say it.
i know he's happy so i'm not interfering.


Date : Wednesday, April 09, 2008
Time : 8:56 PM


ahh eating!
skipped breakfast and lunch.

went to band just nw.
did badly when sir teexian was conducting me.
aw man, im so lousy ):

yah! POLISHED MY INSTRUMENT!
hahahaha now it's so freaking shiny :X

stomach ache la bodohs.!
><
tired yahs,
aft band went to NTUC with agnes.
bought all the ingredients. she bought home.

BOUGHT MY TARTARSAUCE!
so nice cans :X
had dinner, damn full yahs..


Date : Tuesday, April 08, 2008
Time : 9:36 PM


ARGH IT ITCHES!
i've got rashes ):
on both my ankles ._.
-tempting to scratch...-

felt like fainting today.
sitting down or standing up.
giddy in band toos.
hais...

aunt came just nw.
nurtrions! FOOD!

bills are so like, not gona be paid.
hell..yahs.

long day at band.
taught junior sec 1.
rawr, and used my bscl!
)): aww..

tired, wana slp soon!

waiting for sms )):
or at least a conversation on msn.
hais..

hell, now i know
you did it all for her man.
yes, all for her.
heartbreaking story.


Date :
Time : 12:08 AM


if you wana cry,
it's alright to cry.
it's fine to cry on my shoulder,
it's perfectly alright to cry on me.

pour all your tears,
pour all your sorrows,
your problems, whatever is troubling you.

i'll keep it a secret,
you can shout and scream all you want.
i'll keep this a secret,
you'll be secure, safe and sound.

no, i won't backstab you,
because i care, i care.
even if you betray me,
even if you use me,
i won't say a word,

i'll keep it a secret
it's fine with me,
i'll keep this a secret,
forever will it be with me.


Date : Monday, April 07, 2008
Time : 7:54 PM


you smiled to me today
i felt sweet, like as if i was about to melt
it's so charming, so sweet..
but if only you smiled like that to me again.
without a motive.
without her around.
i wonder if she made you smile like that...

long day huh.
had HISTORY EXAM
and then presented LITERATURE NPPA.
and i also presented my CHINESE SPEECH
(WHICH WAS TOTAL CRAP I TELL YA)

and i gota re-say it tomorrow.
hais =="

aft sch rush here and there.
go BAND then go IT then go BAND again.
ya i suck, big time.

man, it's like, GOSH I REALLY MUST PRACTISE MORE YAHS.
it's like, bloody damn freaking irritating when i can't play.

i still can't count superman,
most of the scores are not done,
the only score i'm able to play now is MARCH BLUE SKY
kaze no mai is total crap
superman is a complete thrash
evergreen is like what, i haven touch it yet?
animation medley is like, gosh..............
ya, so how..
practise harder, harder , HARDER and MORE.
more more MORE!

ya and tomorrow's HOME ECON EXAM
and the CHINESE NPPA SPEECH
hais..
and then BAND.

sayonara ):


Date : Sunday, April 06, 2008
Time : 10:24 PM


yeahs!
i reached home at around 8+pm or something.
was at the library from 5-6/7pm? :X
did lite project just nw.

tired man.

hahahas smsing just nw ):
so sad, not online alr, also not smsing alr.

studying my history.
later gona do lite script.
and the nid to memorise the stupid chinese speech thing right...
gosh, die ah! x.x
oh man...

sayonara.
iloveyou (:

ithinkicanforget
ofcoursesureican
butwitheverypassingmoment
itseemsmorelikeyearsthanseconds


Date :
Time : 10:23 PM


Too Busy for a Friend...
One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name.
Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.
It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.

That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual.

On Monday she gave each student his or her list. Before long, the entire class was smiling. 'Really?' she heard whispered. 'I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!' and, 'I didn't know others liked me so much,' were most of the comments.

No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with themselves and one another. That group of students moved on.


Several years later, one of the students was killed in
VietNam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student. She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked so handsome, so mature.

The church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin. The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin.

As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her. 'Were you Mark's math teacher?' he asked. She nodded: 'yes.' Then he said: 'Mark talked about you a lot.'

After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates went together to a luncheon. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting to speak with his teacher.

'We want to show you something,' his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket 'They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it.'

Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times. The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said about him.

'Thank you so much for doing that,' Mark's mother said. 'As you can see, Mark treasured it.'

All of Mark's former classmates started to gather around. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, 'I still have my list. It's in the top drawer of my desk at home.'

Chuck's wife said, 'Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album.'

'I have mine too,' Marilyn said. 'It's in my diary'

Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. 'I carry this with me at all times,' Vicki said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: 'I think we all saved our lists'

That's when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again.

The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life will end one day. And we don't know when that one day will be.

So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are special and important. Tell them, before it is too late.

And One Way To Accomplish This Is: Forward this message on. If you do not send it, you will have, once again passed up the wonderful opportunity to do something nice and beautiful. But it's up to U to fwd this one.

If you've received this, it is because someone cares for you and it means there is probably at least someone for whom you care.

If you're 'too busy' to take those few minutes right now to forward this message on, would this be the VERY first time you didn't do that little thing that would make a difference in your relationships?

The more people that you send this to, the better you'll be at reaching out to those you care about.

Remember, you reap what you sow. What you put into the lives of others comes back into your own.
May Your Day Be Blessed As Special As You


Date :
Time : 12:37 PM


went to church today.
charis gave me a bible :D
thanks loads ^^
and she also bought me a magazine like thing.
about God and stuff.
FRONTLINERS talked about THE RIVER OF LIFE
today :D it's nice :X

hahas and then ytd i forget tell u
i went to mini toons buy things for sis's fren de bdae mahs.
then i wif alicia.
we at the counter there
then i saw a big packet of biscuit which looked like it cost like $2 or smth.
then i look at the price tag, i kip fiddle wif it.
it was 60cents written there.
then the counter lady ask me if i wan buy
then i ask her, how much is it
then she say "60cents"
you know wad i reply..
"60cents?! REALLY AR?"
then alicia laugh and laugh and laugh ._.
ya and i eventually bought it la
but i think i looked stupid back there @@


Date : Saturday, April 05, 2008
Time : 9:20 PM


today went to band,
did drills!

tired.
went to do project aft band.
but of cux, went home to change first.

aww..acted it out but not veri sucessful yahs.
then aft all that went to arcade with alicia.
she spent her $7 on arcade.
all her money ._.
then me and her share @@
she said she blanja me x.x

ya and we shop shop aft that
hahas went to toysRus and mini toons,
YAMAHA and stuff :X

it was fun (: seriously
and i rched home around 9pm?
aww..eating nw x.x
hahahs!

smsing also :X

sayonara :D


Date : Friday, April 04, 2008
Time : 8:03 PM


its always the same.
and in my story.

Cinderella never got her Prince.
because she was too late.

Sleeping Beauty never woke up.
Because the Prince died in the witch's hands.

Snow White never revived from the poisonous apple
because the Prince could not find her

the end.


Date :
Time : 7:43 PM


i just lost my face today ._.
yahs..

haa..got vendoreen reed size 2 today.
when i play no buzzing sound le
okok lahs, medium sound.

am tired today
played the bscl for 4hours over today.
): blahs..

was he irritated.
he didnt respond
she didnt respond.
she thought that he was pissed off.


Date :
Time : 3:09 AM


he made her feel warm,
felt that she was being cared for.
but not anymore, not now.
not ever.

no, u're not viewing the soul of JOY now.
it's the actual person typing this.

it's like 3am+
and i finished my english nppa at 2.50am+
and i just bathed. and my hair is still wet.

worked on it from 11 till 2. lmaos!

getting 2hour or less than that of sleep.
ahh...isn't it like..dreadful.
since im gona have a 8am-12.30pm of schooling
and 1pm/1.30pm-2.30pm/3pm of sectionals.
and stuff like that..

lols.
bathing again in 2hours' time.
boredooms.

i tink i no nid slp also can siahs!
lmaos. :X

haven sms k.k for 2weeks,nearly a month le.
:X lalalas cruel aint i?

late for sch today, hope i not late in like..
4hours/5hours' time?

sayonara.
oyasuminasai (:
(not sleeping yet)


Date : Thursday, April 03, 2008
Time : 8:24 PM


and i watch you
stood there watching you
slowly fade away

today had photo taking.
today, i tink i twisted my leg
then now like got smth inside the bone there,
then when like turn got sound one.
cant walk properly, hope i get well soon.

ah..i looked idiotic.
i used jingjing's blazer @@
cux hers is the small size
then i borrow from her :X
i brought mine..
but.....nvm

boredooms.

eating.

having my chocolate bar later :X


Date : Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Time : 7:31 PM


i really cant help it.
i miss you loads.
even though we see each other often
it's not the same anymore

another day in band.
another day.

ll called today.
but i set to silent
didnt hear it ring in the morning.
it was supposed to be a morning call at 5.18am.

just ate.
had gastric when i was in band and in school
didnt eat the whole day until dinner.

boreds.


Date : Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Time : 8:33 PM


recently been bathing in the purple coloured
relaxation bath foam.
hahas.

so cool, i haf a comb-hair dryer
means like
it's a hair dryer, but u comb ur hair also
so it's like, a 2 in one?
u no need a comb and a hair dryer when u try to dry ur hair
the comb is already fixed there, and it drys ur hair at the same time
when u are combing. made my hair straighter hahas :X

another day in band.
noticed how lousy i am now.
i know how to count, duno hw to apply.
work hard...!

why do u appear so many times before me.
why?
you know how much it hurts?
it's like a bleeding broken heart.



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